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Modern Doctors…

Posted by Mike | May 5, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Academia, Health, Misanthropy, Sexual Diseases, Utter Bullshit, War | Tags: doctors are nature's bastards, doctors today, ezcema, i went to the doctors because i sat on my balls but he didn't give a shit, modern doctors, ointment, painkillers, shutting your penis in a draw, the doctor told me not to eat raw egg but i got it trapped in my anu | 3 Comments »

Hello? The Vatican please.

Posted by Mike | May 4, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Academia, Blind Stupidity, Conversation, Crime, Horror | Tags: but the point of this joke is that this one didn't, catholic priest cartoons, catholic priest jokes, did he molest anyone in real life or did he just tell off the wrong kids, i say roll but i don't really., i was tired when was writing the text and refused to redraw it. that's how i roll, i'm not sure if this joke will land, look at julian assange, molestation accusation is one way to get revenge, priest who do have sex with kids are obviously wrong, sex crime jokes | 2 Comments »

RURAL CRIME WAVE

Posted by Mike | May 3, 2012 | Categories: Crime, Horror | Tags: cornwall, countryside, cow tipping, devon, farms, picking flowers is the countryside equivalent of murder, rural crime wave, shooting trespassers is only a crime if you've got an erection apparently, well that and murder unless you're a farmer and you shoot a trespasser | 1 Comment »

Older Brothers: Always there to help

Posted by Mike | May 2, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Adventure, Blind Stupidity, Conversation, Domestic unease, How and Why, Nefarious Plots | Tags: hermit crab in the ear, hermit crabs will fuck your ear and then eat it. older brother jokes, sand in your underwear and a fucking angry crab in your frontal cortex., trips to the beach when things get shit quickly | 1 Comment »

It seemed easier this way…

Posted by Mike | May 1, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Conversation, How and Why, Misanthropy, Self Improvement | Tags: this is basically my 7th birthday. | 1 Comment »

Rap on trial

Posted by Mike | April 30, 2012 | Categories: Blind Stupidity, Music, Utter Bullshit | Tags: but modern rap is all just rappers boasting about how they're the rest, but surely if they are the best they should shut the fuck up about it and do some actual rapping? no? i guess i'm old fashioned. it's like a shoe salesman going on and on about how fucking dope he is, dumbasses., i like old wu tang, rap music that is about posers is bullshit | 1 Comment »

My brother grew out of this at like 28.

Posted by Mike | April 29, 2012 | Categories: Blind Stupidity, Health, Sport, Utter Bullshit | Tags: actually problem being that it doesn't work as transport., and even better you don't have to talk to anyone on your bike, and you don't have to go outside, exercise bikes are cool, it's like cycling in one place, we both know it didn't wipe that score you sonofabitch | 1 Comment »

The reality of pet shops

Posted by Mike | April 28, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Conversation, Crime, How and Why, Misanthropy, Violence | Tags: i hate pet shops they are like prisons but the prison guards are fat fingered little dickheads, masturbating in prison must be a nightmare., pet shops fucking suck, seriously if you ever want to learn to hate kids then watch them at a zoo or pet shop, the shawshank redemption | Leave A Comment »

Heeey, it’ll be fine in a few hours…

Posted by Mike | April 27, 2012 | Categories: Crime, Health, How and Why, Science, Work | Tags: biting off fingers, dental insurance problems., dentists comics, fiiiiine, i wouldn't really care i'd sew that stinky finger back on, teach the dentist not to diddle my tonsils | Leave A Comment »

Tut. Prison’s are like bloody holiday camps…

Posted by Mike | April 26, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Blind Stupidity, Conversation, Crime, Horror, How and Why, Politics, Prejudice, Utter Bullshit | Tags: at least according to the daily mail, but last time i checked holiday brochures there was not much mention of institutionalised rape, people are fucking stupid, prison jokes, prisons are like holiday camps these days | 1 Comment »

There will be time for questions later…

Posted by Mike | April 25, 2012 | Categories: Academia, Adventure, Blind Stupidity, Conversation, How and Why, Utter Bullshit | Tags: buses, comics about shit times on buses, i glued myself to a bus once, i pissed in a cup on a bus once and when it stopped to let me off it spilled EVERYWHERE. true story, stupid questions | Leave A Comment »

Tv cookery: a new way to feel shit about yourself

Posted by Mike | April 24, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Food, Health, Misanthropy, Nefarious Plots, Nihilism, psychology, Self Improvement | Tags: grated carrot, insecurity, jamie oliver comics, that said i can make a delicious fois gras, tv cookery shit is the new manipulative way of getting in your head, your carrot isn't big enough | Leave A Comment »

Lying in the face of indisputable fact

Posted by Mike | April 23, 2012 | Categories: Academia, Chad, Domestic unease, Mr Nipples, Parenting, Utter Bullshit | Tags: it was moths. | Leave A Comment »

Model Behaviour

Posted by Mike | April 22, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Conversation, Crime, Drugs, Fashion, Food, How and Why, Sexyness | Tags: apple diet, coke, comics about models, heroin, you don't have to do hard drugs to work here but it helps | Leave A Comment »

Making maths appealing to teenage boys

Posted by Mike | April 21, 2012 | Categories: Academia, Sexyness | Tags: 80085, boobs, do you remember calculators, i'm old, kids today, kids with iphones are lucky little shits who need to experience standing in the rain waiting for someone to turn up without a mobile phone to call and check they are enroute, they were computers for kids doing numbers | Leave A Comment »

So… we’re not going bowling?

Posted by Mike | April 20, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Conversation, Domestic unease, Marriage, Parenting, Sport | Tags: bowling, bowling balls (terrible joke), cake i mean money, comics, hamster webcomic, it makes sense, make your kids refund how much it costs to raise them, no one uses actual cake as currency, webcomic, you could get a bunch of shit for all that cake | Leave A Comment »

Social interaction is over rated

Posted by Mike | April 19, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Blind Stupidity, Conversation, How and Why | Tags: comics about rude guests, damn i said too much, i did not lose my job for sniffing shoes, me and my wife, sexy shoes, who invited this dick anyway is the phrase i hear most at parties, who's shoes you sniffing?, wife comics, wow this place smells like ass, your wife has nice shoes | 2 Comments »

Raising Suspicions…

Posted by Mike | April 18, 2012 | Categories: Blind Stupidity, Conversation, Domestic unease, Nefarious Plots, Repressed Homosexuality, Sexyness | Tags: asking for directions, beard, best place to ask for ask for directions if you don't like vaginas very much. being gay is awesome, men only sauna, road maps CAN be hard to read., the best place to ask for directions is a men only sauna without your wife for 3 hours, the closet was for finding narnia. support gay rights. LGBT RIGHTS, this was based on a real place, wait here a second darling | 1 Comment »

legal requirements around comfort blankets

Posted by Mike | April 17, 2012 | Categories: Art, Blind Stupidity, Conversation, Crap Jokes | Tags: advice to parents about the suitability of comfort blankets, anyway so yeah what is this comic about?, blankets, blanky, comfort blankets, copy-write infringement worries, fuck ska, i hate ska, peanuts comics reference in case you didn't get that, seriously like SO much, ska fucking sucks | Leave A Comment »

Terrorism gets SEXY!

Posted by Mike | April 16, 2012 | Categories: Blind Stupidity, Crime, Fashion, Fetish, Horror, How and Why, Nefarious Plots, Politics, Sexyness, Violence, War | Tags: anti terror comics, deformed, explosive package, is that a weapon of mass destruction or you just horribly deoformed in the penis, murder, ooh terrorise me with your package, sexy comics about terrorism, sexy terror, terrorism comics | Leave A Comment »

Finally, historic recreation ‘reality’ tv gets interesting.

Posted by Mike | April 15, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Academia, Adventure, Health, History, How and Why | Tags: comics relating to the tudors, historic research resources, shit in the the face in a once socially acceptable way, this is the only decent period in history because everyone slung their shit in the street rather than feeding it to the poor., tudor comics, you know like those bullshit tv shows where they have to live in victorian times with a bunch of lame actors | Leave A Comment »

pre-historic technowizards. arf arf.

Posted by Mike | April 14, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Crap Jokes, How and Why, Science, Technology | Tags: and i don't mean one of those stupid druids, coconut bra, comics about smashing tvs, did you see when he grew and shitted up baggins, i mean like gandalf and shit. that dude was bad ass, lord of the rings, no wait this isn't even about lord of the rings, technowizard is the most stupid expression unless used to mean a wizard who like techno, was the little dick with the ring called baggins? it's late and shit | Leave A Comment »

Any regrets?

Posted by Mike | April 13, 2012 | Categories: Academia, Horror, Technology | Tags: airplane crashing thoughts, amazing cheap plane tickets, bucket list, bucket lists are stupid just do stuff anyway dumb ass, DMT, regrets, when you die you poop yourself cool right?, wow that is a cynical ploy i'm not selling plane tickets. | Leave A Comment »

The Musical Closet

Posted by Mike | April 12, 2012 | Categories: Crap Jokes, Music, Repressed Homosexuality, Utter Bullshit | Tags: but i totally know the lyrics for wake me up before you go go, club tropicana, drinks are free, i don't know the lyrics for club tropicana, listening to wham doesn't make you gay you ignorant fucking dickhead, music for gay people because you don't have freedom of choice it's in the genes, people are stupid, supposed gay hits, wake me up before you go go, you don't have to leave me solo? yeah i don't know the lyrics for that either | Leave A Comment »

No es bueno Señor Presidente

Posted by Mike | April 11, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Blind Stupidity, Crime, Guns, History, How and Why, Misanthropy, Nefarious Plots, Politics, War | Tags: arab springs, crowd sourced mass killings, microphone is on, No es bueno señor Presidente, south american dictators, that's how you always get caught out, war | Leave A Comment »

Not interesting.

Posted by Mike | April 10, 2012 | Categories: Academia, Blind Stupidity | Tags: FEEL it, interest is subjective, lets all learn from this, sniff it, stop starting conversations with "interesting fact" you are a liar, the main thing to learn is that i'm a dick, touch it | Leave A Comment »

Pizza Box costumes do not aid serious conversation

Posted by Mike | April 9, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Drugs, Self Improvement | Tags: drinking teenagers can be chewy, you square | Leave A Comment »

Chad dreams of da da da da HOLLYWOOD!

Posted by Mike | April 8, 2012 | Categories: Blind Stupidity, Chad, Conversation, Drugs, How and Why, Mr Nipples, Nefarious Plots, Self Improvement | Tags: 2 girls 1 cup wow really?, 4 girls kissing, blow, chang, coke, hollyweird, hollywood is like all coke and butlers right?, is hollywood why there is a global butler shortage? where is my goddam butler., snorty time, white powder | 1 Comment »

Problems understanding OCD

Posted by Mike | April 7, 2012 | Categories: Abuse, Academia, Blind Stupidity, Domestic unease, Evolution, Health | Tags: accurate ocd comics, i don't like musicals of teenagers bursting into song, i had to watch that show while my gf was at uni, mental health comics, obsessive compulsive disorder is not cute like on glee, ocd, ocd doesn't mean you like tidying you cretins | Leave A Comment »

Unimaginative perverts

Posted by Mike | April 6, 2012 | Categories: Fetish, Sexyness | Tags: comics about perverts like my mate dave, despicable perverts, or this guy i also know called tom, pervs, sexy sexy sexy, three times a sexy | Leave A Comment »

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